A better question would be...

...what isn't G saying now?  He's become quite the chatterbox and, truly, I'm patting myself on the back for it.  Him and I have been working consistently on words and speaking and using words to identify things.  We've been working on what sounds certain letters make as well, which just tickles me to death.  He says something new every day, I'm not kidding you.  The other day we heard a noise that I can only assume was more snow falling off the roof and G said to me, "There man in da house."  I said, "There's a man in our house?"  G replied, "Yeah, man in da house."  I said, "Well let's go find him then!"  Thankfully we didn't find anyone.  He tells me, "Wash da choo-choo," when he's in the tub and he takes a washcloth and proceeds to wash his toys.  We hear a lot of, "No, not that one!" but that can get annoying, ha!  When it comes to his DVD's he brings me one and says, "We watch?"  He likes to take a wet wipe and he "washes" everything from the TV ("I wash tv?") to the windows.  His answer for a lot of things, when asked a question is, "I no know."  If I pretend to be sleeping he'll say, "Uh oh momma go nigh-night."  And he'll get his face right up in mine and then say, "Momma get up!"  I can't think of all the new things he's saying but I love hearing them.

There is also a LOT more of momma and daddy having to say, "What are you trying to say buddy?" or "I don't understand what you mean," because he's trying to say something but we can't figure out what he's saying.  I love this stage of little kid-dom because figuring out his language is half the fun for me!  When he has or see's something that he thinks is cool he will take it to the dogs and say, "See bow-wow?  See pubby?"  He also now refers to dogs as goggies.  Whenever he's on the phone he doesn't have a cutie kid "Hi," he flat out says, "Hello!"  A few weeks ago he finally "got" the game of chase and now we hear all the time, "WUN (run) Momma!" or "WUN (run) Garrett!"  When the microwave finishes and beeps he says, "I see beep beep."  Tonight I was working with him that you HEAR with your EAR, that he doesn't see the beep beep, he hears it.  :) 

Now when he wants to do something on his own he says, "My go!"  Not me do or anything that makes sense but "My go!"  I think it's a combination of, "Mine" and "I can do it."  This is, for example, used for things such as me escorting him to the potty by the hand, he pulls his hand away and says, "My go." 

He's been trying to actually write out letters and he doesn't do half bad with that!  I can see where he was trying to go with it and he tells me which letter he's writing.  He knows every letter now but he does get confused every once in awhile by some of the newest ones that he's learned.

He's got some regression going on as far as colors and shapes such, but that's to be expected.  When focusing so hard on one thing it's natural to let other things slide. 

He's insanely busy lately and loud.  Yes, moreso than usual.  He likes to run and jump and scream at the top of his lungs, not because anyone is killing him but because, apparently, sometimes a boy just has to scream.  The other day he had put a broom on the floor and everytime he went near it, he had to jump over it, with both feet.  He's such a physical little turkey.  I find myself wanting to get out and put together his push bike because something tells me he'd really give it a go.  But I bought it for his birthday so I have to try and control myself otherwise what will we get him for his 3rd birthday? 

I ordered some preschool/homeschool supplies such as workbooks and a lesson plan and I'm so excited for them to come in.  Some days he's so interested in learning but most days I can only keep his focus for a few minutes before he is finished with whatever I'm trying to get him to do.  I think that the further into "school" that we go, the more he'll start to like it and therefore pay attention for longer periods of time.  I hope that's the case anyway otherwise this whole homeschool thing is going to be rather painful for the two of us.

But the newest and best thing, to this sappy old lady, is the lovey-doveyness.  I'm getting hugs and kisses galore.  He likes to say, "Ooooh momma, oh!" as he hugs me.  Or he hugs me and says, "Ug-ug-ug momma."  I get kisses completely unsolicited and I don't care that he even kisses the wall sometimes, or the dogs or his bed, I can't get enough of the affection!  He likes to take my face in his hands and plant a big, long smooch on me.  He has to kiss me goodnight before he falls asleep and he insists on holding my hand when falling asleep.  So even though he's even more boisterous than normal, he's also much more sweet too!

Christmas 2010 photo book

Click here to view this photo book larger

He's going to be giant!

Not like that's news to anyone who knows G.  Six foot four sounds like about the right height for a left fielder or a quarterback, right?  

boys *shakes head*

A glimpse of my future perhaps?

all by myself

I got an invited to a baby shower tomorrow (01/22) for a woman that E works with and who I have never met.  The other day when G and I were in town for play group I stopped at Joann's and picked out some girly fabric since the shower invite said that she needed receiving blankets for swaddling and the ultrasound showed it was a girl.  Perfect, a nice basic receiving blanket, I can do that!  I got some satin ribbon to use as the binding even though I've never done anything with a binding before.  Last night I started cutting and sewing and discovered that I suck at the cutting part of things but my machine and I seem to be understanding each other much better. 

I even thought enough to put one color of thread on the top bobbin and the other color of thread on the bottom one.  Shut up, that's big for me!

It felt so nice to "create" in my head and there's something very "linear" about sewing with the straight lines, the numbers and math, the visual aspect, etc.  I found it all very relaxing!  I powered up my iPod, which I haven't listened to in AGES and I went to town for hours.  I tried to listen to my iPod when I would sit and nurse G but it always distracted him so I put it away and kind of forgot about it.  I always want to have my "momma ears" free so I can hear G if he needs me.  Sadly, he is old enough now that I figured he could just come and get me if he needs me.  I didn't want to stop when I did (at 4 am) and when I went to bed I couldn't fall asleep because I was running through what to do next, how to put it together, etc.  I finally did fall asleep and my pal G was kind enough to wake me up at 7:30 am.

Why is it that I love ironing the fabric but hate ironing clothes?  Is that the creative side of me coming out?  There's no creative satisfaction/ending to ironing dress shirts but there is to ironing flat the seams!

I took all the pairs and sewed them 4 across (so 8 squares).

Then I pinned those 10 strips of 8 squares together and sewed them, thus forming the top of the blanket!

I worked by the window just because the light was so nice.  Yes, that's snow you see all the way up to the window.  It falls off the roof in the back and it's about 6' deep back there!  It'll stick around until mid-June since the sun never touches that part of the yard.

What started as a receiving blanket has turned into a quilt, and not a tiny one either.  I messed up when putting the strips together and ended up having to do the pattern with the two like strips together like you see above.  Whoops.  And I didn't get enough fabric but thankfully had the green with polka dots from way back when Hancock Fabrics closed in Poky a few years ago.  They go really nicely together, surprisingly.  I love fabric.  I don't know why, I just do.  I can't hardly sew yet I have a small dresser full of gorgeous fabric.  Anyway, I pinned the front and back together and folded the edges in like a sandwich, then sewed them.  Now I need to put the satin ribbon binding on and quilt it somehow.  Or quilt it and then put the ribbon on?  Heck if I know.  So far I'm kind of proud of myself for how it's turning out so far!

More play group!

We walked into the CDC and G immediately went up to a little boy that he'd met last time and he hugged him.  I about passed out from the cutness but too bad the other little boy stood there still as a board, as if he was having a prostate exam or something.  G bounced around like it was his party or something.  Other kids were dressed up in costumes that they'd pulled out just for this play date but G didn't pay any attention to that.  I kind of wish that they'd open it up so that we could go play in the gross motor skills room where there are slides and climbing cubes and all that jazz.  It makes me want spring/summer where I can take G to the park!  They had pizza for dinner so Kim actually got to see that G eats sometimes since he devoured more than half a piece!  Of course that's only because I followed him around with it and had it whenever he wanted to stop long enough to take a bite.  Him and the little boy Dylan (sp?) eventually started play together which was fun to watch.  G's a little taller than Dylan but Dylan is an impressively accurate little talker.  Dylan was trying to teach G all about monsters.  Yeah, thanks kid. 

Here's G with what has to be my favorite part of the CDC, the mini toidy's they have!  Cracks me up every time I see it!!!

Some day...

~Some day I'll be able to go 24+ hours without checking Facebook or my email.

~Some day I won't have to dread getting the mail and seeing how many bills there are.

~Some day I will go to bed at a normal time and wake up at a normal time.

~Some day I will have a job that I enjoy doing instead of one where I try to think of reasons to not go to work and excuses on how to get out of work.

~Some day I will understand the correct application of affect and effect. 

~Some day the hairs in my nose will be burned out completely and I won't have to smell farts ever again.

~Some day I will get laser hair removal so I don't have to put myself through the torture of mustache waxes.

~Some day I will learn to take a deep breath before responding.

~Some day I will give up on having a sibling for G.

~Some day I hope to feel like an actual grown up instead of a 14 year old living the life of a grown up and wondering how the heck no one realizes I'm still just a kid.

~Some day I will be able to take a hike/walk and keep my head up instead of having to watch my feet so I don't trip and hurt myself all the time.

~Some day I will convince my sister that she's an amazing, caring, intelligent, pragmatic, impossible, wonderful, sincere, hard headed, beautiful, delicate, gifted, frank, brave, faithful, moral, lively, protective, successful, plucky, witty and splendid person.

~Some day I will earn a blue ribbon at a fair.  I don't know what for yet, but it'll happen even if I have to be that crazy old woman who grows a gigantic garden and raises bunnies.

~Some day I will be able to walk in my front yard without having to watch for dog poop because I will know that someone else picked it all up (that will become a G chore when he's old enough). 

~Some day I might understand why in the world E loves me enough to marry me, parent with me and stay with me through everything bad.

~Some day I will have hardwood floors in my house.

~Some day I will actually make it glaringly apparent to people that I'm a blooming idiot who doesn't know what she's doing or saying 98% of the time.

~Some day I will wish that my son needed me to lay down with him and hold his hand so he can go to sleep at night.

~Some day I'll paint the bathrooms in this place, probably just in time for us to move out.

~Some day I'll play the stock market.  I'll probably fail miserably and hate the experience, but I'll be able to say I did it.

~Some day I will welcome the love of G's life into my heart as if she was the daughter I never get to have.

~Some day I will wear flip flops in the snow.

~Some day I will take E to a tropical destination and we'll lounge on beach chairs in our old people swimming suits and think to ourselves, "Why didn't we do this years ago?" 

~Some day I will be able to be away from G for more than a few hours at a time without my heart aching like it's about to rip in two.

~Some day I will forgive those that have wronged me as I've been so graciously forgiven.

~Some day I will die knowing that I made this world a better place just by being in it. 

Head scratcher...

I went to town today, by myself, with the intent to buy a bunch of Tillamook yogurt that G loves (thanks for that one, Nana) since it was on sale.  I had an Amazon return package to drop off as well, and I figured since it felt like I have a UTI I'd see if I could get in at the clinic. 

I stopped in at the clinic and asked if it was possible that I get in within the next hour or so, figuring that it might in fact be possible because, well, they're not overly popular.  Sure, come back at 3 pm they tell me.  I went and got the groceries and then went to the place advertising shipping and was told that there is no UPS drop off location in the entire town.  Lovely.  But the old man behind the counter told me to flag down "Dave" the UPS driver, if I saw him.  Uh, okay.

I went to the appointment where I got to see a doctor that I later found out is new to the clinic.  Here's where you should stop reading if you are TMI shy because I'm going to make references to girly bits.  The doctor was female and what E would describe as "granola."  She began our conversation by asking if I'd taken that medication that turns your urine color.  Uh, yeah, I had.  Okay, well they can't do the dip dye test.  Okay...  Then she started to explain that they don't have the "spinner thingy" for the other way to do the test (and then look at it under a microscope).  Uh, okay again.  So she couldn't verify if I do or do not have a UTI.  I informed her that I'm no stranger to UTI's since my RA medications make me prone to them.  She then informed me that she gets them a lot too and that her's are usually from not wiping after intercourse.  Uh, thanks Doc, I needed to know that tidbit about you.  I told her that I drink too much soda and not enough water and she proceeded to inform me that the "bubbly stuff" which she later corrected herself to identify as phosphorus can mess with one's "vaginal fauna."  Okay, not breaking news here.  What makes me want to tell you this?  Well, as she's saying the words, "vaginal fauna" she begins to point quite adamantly to her cooter region.  Because apparently I'm not familiar with the word vagina.  I had to work hard to keep it together at that point.

Then she started questioning my choice of birth control.  Keep in mind I've never seen this woman before and we're about five minutes into the appointment.  Somehow between telling me she doesn't wipe after sex and showing me where her cooter is located we've become close friends.  Then she feels the need to explain to me how to have a "whoops" pregnancy and that my husband will be okay with it eventually.  This conversation then turns into her recommendation that I consider adoption.  You know, not that she prefers to liken human child adoption to adopting dogs from the pound but she figures if there are children out there that needs homes, why give birth to one when you can take one of those children.  BTW, a good friend of her's has adopted five or six (because that's something you can lose track of?) children from Haiti.  Well, okay then.

She sent over my prescrip for an antibiotic and I was dismissed when she just left the room. 

Here's the strangest part of the whole appointment/thing.  I kind of liked her.  I have no idea why - none.  There was something about her incredible oddness that I liked.  That right there is my head scratcher...

Oh and for what it's worth, I did see "Dave" the UPS man driving down the highway so I flipped a u-turn and followed him and dropped my package off with him.  Ah, the many, many benefits to living in (well, 45 miles outside of) a small town!

My momma ego feed...

We had a visit from our family services worker today - the one from the CDC who is helping me with G's language delay and all that jazz. I think she's the bomb, so down to earth and easy going and smart!

She was floored today. She was so impressed with G (it's been more than a month since she's worked with him) because he has really just exploded with some stuff. Not only language wise but he's also focusing a little better and expressing things that he never expressed before. He says sorry when he's doing something (well, gets caught doing something) he's not supposed to do or when he hits me or anything like that - situations that warrant remorse. He still identifies all sorts of things but doesn't use the actual words. I.E. I can say, "Which is the number 24?" And he'll point to the 24 but he won't say it. He says "two" and "ten" consistently but that's it but he'll now identify when there is two of something (i.e. "two eyes"). He's stringing 4-8 word sentences together where before he expressed most things physically, i.e. taking me to the fridge and grunting if he wanted a drink whereas now he says, "More gogo weeze momma?" Or he'll answer a question with, "No, not that one." Or when I call the dogs back inside and Crash doesn't immediately come running G will say, "Where da pubby go? Where he go?"

She said that he's "calmer" which I noticed as well. Don't get excited, he's nowhere near "calm" by anyone's standard but just something about his nature isn't as "bratty" (yeah, I called my kid bratty). Before when I'd tell him no and redirect him it'd result in a tantrum and now when I redirect him and tell him no he just moves on, he rolls with it. He's still a little obsessive about some things (toys or books) but the obsession moves from one thing to another, it's not just one singular thing so it's not worrisome.

So my "work" this month is to sabotage his environment. I guess that means (I haven't finished reading the handouts she brought me) that I take something that he likes/wants but won't actually say (i.e. cracker, chip, book) and put it in something so that he has to ask for help to get it and I say, "What? What is it that you want?" to try and encourage him to say the word for the item instead of just "dat one" or pointing to what he wants. Trying to get the verbal not the physical.

And holy crap this kid's personality was huge from birth but he just gets funnier and funnier. He had her rolling with laughter. Some of the stuff that he does or says lately is just a hoot like when we were walking towards the shop and he saw a snowplow pull in and he yelled, "RUN!" and he came running to me like I was going to save him. :) He answers questions with "YES!" Not yeah or ya but a resounding YES and he puts an emphasis on the S. It's so stinking funny!!! He stole a can of tub & tile cleaner and he took it and sprayed it all over his "daddy truck" (a maroon F250 that our neighbors got him for Christmas) just like daddy does and then he came and got Daddy and brought him into his room so Daddy could help wash the truck like G helps him!

She's started to get "stuck" as to what to "do with" him simply because, according to her, "He's so, SO smart. He's so advanced." She's running out of ideas to get the language to "click" but she also thinks that his language is exploding right now and that were not even going to need her in the next few months.

Oh and she gave me a few suggestions about how to help him to not freak out about tooth brushing. She said it's another one of the signs that he has a sensory processing issue, that along with his all of a sudden squinting his eyes and wrinkling up his nose but to me he only does it because it makes me laugh.
 
Anyway, I thought I'd take a minute to update because, well, I can!  I'm so glad that I went ahead with the program because so far it's accomplishing what I wanted it to, it's giving me the tools to help him.

did the do's

Remember my project list from last week?  I've been kickin' ass and takin' names!

#1 - bed is stained, varnished and set up in G's room.
#2 - haven't even started it, haven't cut any fabric, nothing. 
#3 - well if I haven't done #2 I certainly haven't tackled #3.  :)
#4 - GO ME!  It's up and running and I downloaded some work audios to it today and they're ready for me to do.  It was a frustrating process but thanks to my tech support department (i.e. my older brother John) I got it done!  And trust me, he didn't have to do much in the help department, I always try to figure stuff out on my own before I bother him.
#5 - I haven't so much started on the LR book but I have been reading online (like at the Pioneer Woman) about exposure and aperture, lighting, etc).  So it's a step in the right direction.  Also, see my post about the 365 project.  I know I'm only 6 days in but I'm really enjoying it so far!
#6 - I haven't gotten much done on the photobooks but I did order some prints that used up my $25 credit.
#7 - See #6.
#8 - See #6.
#9 - not even on the horizon.

Oh, but I did finally dirty up and break in the Kitchenaid!  I made mashed potatoes with it last night and banana bread today.  That thing works like a dream!!!

Happy Birthday you little turkey!

For some reason G decided to crawl under my bed while I was in the bathroom and the next thing I know the Thomas & Friends Mega House that I bought him and was saving for his birthday has been set up in the living room.  He'd taken it to E and he just assumed and pulled it out of the box.  That thing is huge, as you can see from the picture!  It is normally $65 but I got it on sale for $18.  G has a much, much smaller version of this big bad boy and he loves that thing so I thought this might be a hit.  It was...even if it was a hit about six months early. 

BIG big boy bed!

It's done and it's set up in G's room.  And if I do say so myself, it looks great. 
He loves it for 4 main reasons:
1.  It's "new" to him. 
2.  He now has a cool hiding space underneath the bed! 
3.  He has to climb to get into it.
4.  He can jump nice and high on it. 

It's higher than we intended, I think it's made for just a mattress, not a mattress and a boxspring.  But oh well, I didn't pay for that boxspring to put it in the garage, though I'm sure the mice would love it if we did that.  I'm hoping that we don't end up having to buy one of those bed rail things because they aren't cheap! 

The bed frame is missing two important lock things for the screws and I'm hoping that Ed can find something similar because they are very needed.  Since we got it off of Craigslist and it was half of a bunkbed that might not be very easy.  I'm the master internet searcher and I have no idea what to even put in a search engine to go about finding them! 

Awhile ago I had found a bedskirt at Ross for a whopping $1.99.  After putting the mattress on the bed, E managed to rip the bedskirt.  No problem for me, I just took it back off and marched into my sewing room and fixed it!  :)  It can't not have a bedskirt - that's what makes it a cool fort under there!  It makes me excited and intimidated to get started on making G's cool train taggy blanket.  I haven't cut any of the fabric or ribbon still but that's because I've been keeping busy.  And the coolest part about having one's bed on a frame (when you're a boy or a girl) is having a new hiding spot!!!

I remember in February 2010 I posted about changing G from his crib to his toddler bed. And now he's rocking a reglar kid twin size bed.

The cross hangs at the headboard. Sarah bought it for him for Christmas this year and it's easily my very favorite of his Christmas gifts this year. :)

Excerpt from a book I just finished...

A moment where you looked into a boy's eyes and felt the world spin from beneath your feet; when you saw in his soul all the things that were missing in yours.  Love came slow and surefooted and was made of equal measures of comfort and respect.

I miss my Dad

There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

365 project

I was thinking of doing something similar in another stand alone page on my blog but then I found this!  This is way better anyway because I'll be exposed to a lot of other people...and subsequently learn from them and pic up some ideas!  One of my wishes is to learn my camera's capabilities more in depth this year and turn out some amazing photo's of this place where we live before we don't live here any longer!!! 

Once I get the package from Mom with cd's for Dad's computer then I'll get that loaded and set up and then I'll have my big monitor to edit pictures on.  If the OT comes through for E I'll be able to get my 300 lens and my speedlight this summer sometime and that'll only give me different opportunities for pictures!  If it warms up outside I'll be able to take G outside to play and use the Fotodio that E bought me for Christmas!

A photo a day...can I do it?  Der.  Ask anyone who is on my Facebook, I'm obnoxious with the amount of photo's that I post!  So in lieu of doing said page I joined this community online and hope to have a lot of fun with it over the next year!  If it's something that interests you please do join it and let me know your name on there and I'll "follow" you!  I'd love to see what other people come up with in their day to day lives!!!

Resolute!

#1 - Learn patience...
   a.  With G, respond with calm and quiet, not yelling.
   b.  With goals, take smaller steps to try to achieve them instead of overloading myself and trying to   
        do too much at once.
   c.  With Ed when he does something that I don't like I need to tell him then in a non-confrontational
        way, just a communicative one, that way I won't carry so much frustration and irritation around
        with me all the time.
   d.  With the dogs who, after all, are just animals.  Dogs are meant to bark when people come to the
        door and me yelling at them does nothing positive for me, or them or whoever is at the door.
   e.  With Ed's children who rarely call him and never gift him.  Here I am wishing that my Dad
        was still here to love and his kids don't even see what they are missing out on.  I have to realize
        that the H family is not the same as the one I grew up with and not everyone is like us, and that's
        okay.  But I will continue to try and push for us to do more with them so maybe the bond can be
        strengthened before it's too late.

#2 - Push myself to do something new once a month at least. 
   a.  Break out the guitar I've had for a few years now and do more than just fiddle around on it.  I can
        look for tutorials and other resources online to get me started.  Maybe once I get a little more
        comfortable with it I will be able to justify some lessons?
   b.  pick up one of the gardner (sp?) snakes that G and I run across this summer even though just the
        thought of doing that is making me hyperventilate.
   c.  sewing projects of all kinds, including sewing the summer top that I bought both the fabric and
        pattern for this last summer and never even started.

#3 - Have another baby or be on the road to having another baby OR figure out how to come to terms with never having another baby.
   a.  Win the lotto so we can afford it.
   b.  Convince Ed that a sibling would be quite the gift to G.

#4 - Lose some more weight and get my body healthier so that my joints won't hurt as much and maybe I can cut back on or cut out some of the toxic chemicals (medication) that I put in my body.
   a.  Break out the snowshoes and Kelty pack!
   b.  We have a treadmill, it's set up and ready to go.  It was pretty expensive and it's about time that I
        get a return on my investment. 
   c.  Start cooking meals that include more fruits and veggies and grains, etc. 
   d.  Cut back on Pepsi (yes, again) or cut it out completely.  I need to get that sludge out of my system
        anyway!

#5 - Get back to school!  I miss learning :(  I am going to have to make the time since I don't have any extra leftover between my paying work and G right now, but I need to do this.  I said I wanted to come out of Powell with my Master's and we're coming up on two years that we've been here now...time's awastin'!
   a.  First goal set is to start back at the end of the summer 2011.  I think to try before then would be futile.

http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2010/12/5-questions-to-help-you-make-effective-new-years-resolutions.html
Five questions to help you make effective New Year's resolutions.
1. Ask: “What would make me happier?”
2. Ask: “What is a concrete action that would bring about change?”
3. Ask: “Am I a ‘yes’ resolver or a ‘no’ resolver?”
4. Ask: “Am I starting small enough?”
5. Ask: “How am I going to hold myself accountable?”